Jeremiah 29:13-14: “You will seek (baqash) me and find me when you seek (darash) me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.”

As a former addict and alcoholic I spent a lot of time in 12 Step Meetings. One of the hardest hitting ideas in the Twelve Steps to me personally is step 11: “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.”

CONSCIOUS CONTACT. When we look at the Word spoken through Jeremiah in the passage above we see that the Lord does not hide Himself from us – He isn’t hard to find – but it takes a sort of effort from our side.

Looking at the Hebrew words BAQASH and DARASH in this passage we find that the Lord requires two things of us.

“Baqash’ is also translated as ‘desire’, to ‘plead’ or ‘beg for’ and to ‘aim’.

‘Darash’ is to get up and go looking, to ‘ask’, to ‘study’, to ‘call’.

What God is saying is: “I WILL BE FOUND BY YOU when you DESIRE ME, set your sights on Me – HUNGER AND THIRST for Me – and then ACT ON THAT DESIRE by LOOKING, by ASKING, by STUDYING, by CALLING.”

Our ‘contact’ with God needs to be ‘conscious’ – born of desire and pursued with action. Our ‘contact’ or ‘finding God’ should be intentional – an exercise in mindfulness.

I would like to add the word ‘constant’ to the mix.

Scripture encourages us to ‘pray without ceasing’ (1 Thes. 5:16-18, Luke 18:1:), to pray about everything (Phil 4:6:), to meditate on His Word day and night (Joshua 1:8, Psalm 1:1-2:) – Scripture encourages us to be consistent in our efforts for ‘conscious contact’. Scripture calls for CONSTANT CONSCIOUS CONTACT.

The Psalmist in Psalm 116 proclaims: I will praise Him as long as I live – as long as I have breathe in my lungs – I will praise Him!

In Genesis 2:7: we read that God breathed life into Adam – and his lungs reacted – expanded, inhaled, exhaled…

If worship is our response to our Creator, our response to the goodness and glory of God (Psalm 116) then Adam’s response to his Creator was the first act of worship.

If we meditate on this a little bit we might come to realize that our worship, our prayer, our meditation – our seeking out the Lord should be as breathing to us.

Just like breath is life to the body, so also prayer, meditation, the study of His Word, and our worship is life to our souls.

God wants to dwell in our midst – He doesn’t want to come and visit once in a while. He doesn’t need a holiday home. He wants to tabernacle here among us. He wants to establish His throne here and now in our hearts and in our lives. He desires to be with us.

And all we have to do is breathe.

All we need to do is start being present in His presence. Being mindful of maintaining that constant conscious contact with the Lord.

Worship should become a lifestyle. Prayer should become a lifestyle. His presence should be the air we breathe. His Word should be the daily bread that feeds and sustains us.

God is not hiding. He is just waiting for you to make a move.

God is still breathing life into dry bones. It is time you let your lungs respond.

Prayer: Lord, right now I invite Your Holy Spirit to come and invade my life. Let Your love and presence flood my soul. Hear the longing and the thirsting of my heart as I acknowledge that I am lost without You. Bring water to dry places Lord, feed me and restore me. Give me the wisdom to seek You, and as I seek You let it become like breathing to me. Ignite a fire in my heart that burns for You – awaken and stir up a longing that desires You above all else – and as I seek You Lord, I know You are faithful. As I seek You Lord, do not hide Your face from me, but allow me to see and experience the beauty of Your presence in my life today. Amen.

Speaking about the thorn in his flesh, Paul writes the following in 2 Corinthians 12:

”9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

A little over 8 years ago I was living a double life. I was a youth pastor and worship leader, but also a drug addict and alcoholic. I had my own thorn in my flesh.

All of this culminated in me ending up on the cold, concrete floor of the local jail.

I was arrested twice in that time – once by the local authorities – and after that by the grace and mercy of our God.

It was in that time that I encountered God like never before.

I have become increasingly grateful for His mercy and grace. Grace is often defined as ‘getting what you did not deserve’. Mercy on the other hand is ‘not getting what you DO deserve’.

The fact that I fully deserved the judgement, not only of man and the legal system, but also the judgement of God Almighty – but was given mercy instead – causes me to tremble. Leaves me astonished.

When I think of the times I should’ve died – near overdoses, hanging out with guns and gangsters, bad batches and bad friends – I am grateful to be alive today.

8 years ago today I stepped into my last ‘first’ 12 Step Meeting. I had relapsed the day before (after stringing together +/- 3 months of sobriety and narrowly escaping a 6 month prison sentence I still had not learnt my lesson), but had returned to the fold again – this time taking that first step on purpose.

That meeting ended with a prayer. Just before the prayer we all stood holding hands in a circle, and someone said: “We stand this way to remind ourselves we need never stand alone again, unless we choose to…”

These words have kept me clean. 

I know that my life has not been ideal – that I have not lived a perfect life – but I am grateful that God never let go of me, and that even throughout my addiction, even throughout my clinical depression, mental illness, physical infirmity and moments of doubt and fear I have always found shelter in Him. I had to go through darkness – even though I have served Him (even in my addiction, with all my flaws and failures, I was faithful and committed) just over 2 decades – to know the fullness of His grace and mercy. The fact that even at my darkest He saw me. Even at my lowest He loved me. And He NEVER LET GO. He promised us: “I will never leave or forsake you – I will never let you be alone!”

Just like He promised Joshua: ‘Be strong and of good courage, I am with you!” He is with you!

I am writing this post for the families of the addicted. There is hope. Your husband, wife, daughter, son, brother, sister – they can recover! They can still come home! No matter how far they may have strayed.

Finally and foremostly I am writing this post to carry the message of hope to the still suffering addict and alcoholic – to carry the light back into darkness and call more of the suffering, broken and weary back home.

Jesus says: come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. (Matt 11:28-30)

If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, if you are broken and weary, if you are still suffering in silence – know that you are not alone.

If you have a problem with drugs or alcohol – so did I.

Come fall before the mercy and grace of Jesus. Let His love flood Your soul.

And if you ever need a friend, come lean on me.

I am writing this for you. You are not alone. We will love you until you learn to love yourself. You don’t ever need to be alone again.

Prayer: Thank You Lord that I am not alone in my trials and my tribulations. Thank You Lord that You hear me when I call and that those who put their trust in You have never been put to shame. You are the chain breaker. You are the miracle worker. And I thank You Lord that You are working freedom in my life today. I thank You that You are silencing the voices of fear and insecurity, and that I will hear the tender whispers of Your heart today. Remind me today, Lord, of the places I have been and help me be a faithful witness of Your love, grace and mercy to those who are still going through their storms. In Jesus name. Amen.

Psalm 33:22 Let your unfailing love be with us, Lord, even as we put our hope in you.

In this world, in our lives, we will have trouble. We will have issues. We will go through storms – pain, illness, persecution, family issues, financial ups and downs – the Bible teaches us that the same kinds of things befall both the righteous and the unrighteous… (Ecclesiastes 9)

Paul acknowledges this in most of his letters. Life gets difficult at times… And your faith does not take away the fact that we live in a fallen world where sometimes life happens.

Paul still got sick (Galatians 4:13), he still went through depression and anxiety (2 Corinthians 1:8-11), he still suffered injury (Acts 14:19), he still got into shipwrecks / accidents (Acts 27), he still faced persecution (Acts 13:50), unfair accusation and imprisonment (Acts 21) and financial troubles (Phil 4:12:). He actually sums this up in 2 Corinthians 11:21-29:

“Whatever anyone else dares to boast about—I am speaking as a fool—I also dare to boast about. Are they Hebrews? So am I. Are they Israelites? So am I. Are they Abraham’s descendants? So am I. Are they servants of Christ? (I am out of my mind to talk like this.) I am more. I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely, and been exposed to death again and again. Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was pelted with stones, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, ²⁶ I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my fellow Jews, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false believers. ²⁷ I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked.  Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches. Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn?”

Paul went through some very real ‘stuff’. And you might be reading this and going through some very real ‘stuff’. And I want to tell you it’s okay. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t a ‘true believer’ and it definitely doesn’t mean that God has forsaken you.

You might have some family issues – God wants to restore your family.

You might be struggling with depression or addiction – God wants to free you, heal you and make you whole.

You might be worried about how you are going to feed your family – but God is making a way for you today.

Even though Paul went through some ‘stuff’ that made him ‘despair unto death’ (2 Corinthians 1:8-11)- he knew what to do in the face of these storms. Trust and rest in God. God is the one who delivers us. He has been on Your side and will continue to be there to catch you when you fall.

It is from this perspective that Paul writes Romans 5:

“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, ² through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. ³ Not only so, but we^[c] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴ perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

When we were still powerless – weak – Christ died for us. He demonstrated His love on the Cross, with open arms, calling ‘come to Me.’

In our powerlessness – when we find ourselves in those times and places where we have no control, where we don’t know what to do and where we feel like our backs are against the wall – in those moments where we despair unto death because there is no way out – turn to The Way! Jesus is the Way. In our weakness He is strong.

Jesus knew we would still have trouble – in fact, He told His disciples that very thing – ‘in this world you will have trouble’ – trials, temptations and tribulations will no doubt come. Storms will come. Life will still happen. But we are not hopeless anymore.

When we cast our burdens unto Jesus – when we hear the Shepherd calling ‘come’ and run to Him we come to the same realization that Paul came to in Romans 8:28-39:

”And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:

“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Because He lives – because Jesus has conquered death, disease and despair – I can face tomorrow. I can face the unknown. I can face those things that I feel unsure about – because this one thing is sure and certain – Jesus is the Rock of my Salvation. He is the Good Father, the Good Shepherd and the Lover of my Soul. He is my Stronghold. My Healer, my Provider, my Strength, my Hope and my Future.

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow as more than a conqueror – knowing that nothing – no situation or circumstance can separate me from His love – His love that works all things to our good.

Because He lives, and because He loves me I know everything will be okay.

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.

Prayer: Lord, help me today to see Your hand in my life – to see that Your Hand has never been too short to reach me. Help me Lord, to feel Your love today. Help me Lord, in this moment, here where I find myself right now, to put my trust in You and rest in who You are. I thank You Lord that You give me the strength to endure and wait on You and trust Your process. Thank You Lord for Your blood on the cross. The blood that cleanses me of my sin and iniquity, but also through which my healing was paid. I declare healing over my body, over my mind, and my emotions in Jesus name. In the mighty name of Jesus I declare healing and restoration over my family and my finances. I thank You Lord that my present problems are promises waiting to be fulfilled. I thank You Lord that my test will be my testimony. I thank You Lord that Your love is working all things to my good. Because You are alive – risen from the dead – I too can rise up out of my situation. In Jesus name. Amen.

In Luke 12, teaching about money and possessions, Jesus makes the following strong statement:

“33 Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will never fail, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. 34 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

As humans we are always running after something – we never stop running after things. We are always chasing a better job, more money, fame, esteem, a bigger house, a faster car – a brighter future or lasting legacy – the list goes on and on.

We want. We always want more. Sometimes we don’t even know why we want it – but we do.

The sad thing is that, often, when we get what we want – when we finally have that balance in our account, that car in our driveway or our name in lights – it isn’t enough. It doesn’t satisfy. Freud wrote about this – and in his writings our drive and desires are often a negative thing – a cycle without any resolution or relief.

Often the thing we’ve spent so much time and effort – sometimes all our lives – chasing is found to be empty and utterly unfulfilling.

In Luke 12 Jesus urges us to let go of these things – to let go of our cranial wants and needs: “22 Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23 For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.”

In verse 30 Jesus makes it clear that these are the priorities of the unbeliever – the pagan world runs after these things!

Instead Jesus encourages us to store up treasures in Heaven – to seek the righteousness of the Kingdom of God. To come to a place of reverence, relationship and revelation in our walk with Him.

Nothing on this earth – nothing in this life – can satisfy. 

True peace, contentment and joy can only be found in Christ.

In the Binding of Isaac (Genesis 22) we see Abraham going up Mt. Moriah to lay down and sacrifice his beloved son – Isaac. 

This is powerful – not only is Isaac his son – but also represents Abraham’s lifelong dreams – the ‘satisfaction’ of his wants, needs and desires – the answer to Abraham’s prayers. Isaac represents the lifelong pursuit of Abraham – his future. His legacy.

And God tells him to take his beloved son – the long awaited fulfilment of all of these dreams and desires – and burn him on an altar.

Yet Abraham obeys. Abraham knows that God’s ways are higher than our own – His plans are better than our plans.

Abraham lays down his Isaac – his dreams, desires – his life on the altar.

And that is when God intervenes. That is the moment where God provides.

Abraham renames the mountain ‘Jehovah-Jireh’ literally translating as “God has seen.”

Genesis 22:15-18:

“15 The angel of the Lord called to Abraham from heaven a second time 16 and said, “I swear by myself, declares the Lord, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, 17 I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, 18 and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed, because you have obeyed me.”

Jesus is telling us to take our eyes off our vain desires and small ambitions. He is urging us to look away from the things that CANNOT satisfy and set our eyes on the only One who can!

We have gotten into the habit of trading our sorrows, our sickness, our sin and shame for the goodness of God.

Jesus wants us to do the same with our dreams, ambitions and desires.

“Seek ye first the righteousness of the Kingdom of God…”

Lay down your life and legacy on the altar today and see what God does.

Hebrews 13:5:

“Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Luke 12:6-7:

“Are not five sparrows sold for two copper coins? And not one of them is forgotten before God. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.”

Rest in God today. He is still Jireh – the God who sees you and sees to your needs.

He will provide.

Prayer: Lord, help me today to trust in You. Help me keep my eyes set on You. Your ways are higher than my ways, and Your plans for me are better than my own. As I surrender to You Lord, flood my life with Your peace and love. As I lay down my life and legacy on Your altar Lord, ordain my steps to walk according to Your plan. As I give up my desires and delight in You Lord, I thank You that You will see to every need. You are more than enough. You are all I want. Flood my life with more of You. Come and satisfy the thirsting of my soul. In Jesus name. Amen.